Monday Pick Me Upper: Redneck Computer Definitions

My husband's a redneck, and he says that I am the Filipino version. So here is a list of computer terms, defined according to a redneck's perspective. (Thanks to Jokepier.)

BACKUP: What you do when you run over a skunk in the woods.
BAR CODE: Theme’s the fight’s rules down at the local tavern.
BUG: The reason you give for calling in sick.
BYTE: What your pit bull dun to cousin Metro.
CACHE: Needed when you run out of food stamps.
CHIP: Pasture muffins that you try not to step in.
COMPUTER TERMINAL: Time to call the undertaker.
CRASH: When you go to Junior's party uninvited.
DIGITAL: The art of counting on your fingers.
DISKETTE: A female Disco dancer.
FAX: What you lie about to the IRS.
HACKER: Uncle Leroy after 32 years of smoking.
INTERNET: Where cafeteria workers keep their hair.
KEYBOARD: Where you hang the keys to the John Deere.
MAC: Big Bubba's favorite fast food.
MEGAHERTZ: How your head feels after 17 beers.
MODEM: What yaw do when the grass gets too high.
MOUSE PAD: Where Mickey and Minnie live.
NETWORK: Scoop’s up a big fish before it breaks the line.
ONLINE: Where you stay when taking the sobriety test.
ROM: Where the pope lives.
SCREEN: Helps keep the skitters off the porch.
SERIAL PORT: A red wine you drink with breakfast.
SUPERCONDUCTOR: Amtrak's Employee of the year.

Now that's why he is always ONLINE... ;)

Photo courtesy of Emmitsburg

Earth Hour, F1, and American Idol

What do these three things have in common? TV.

I am not big on TV. I see it merely as a piece of furniture. Yet in these past weeks, I have been turning that black box (well, silver in my case) quite often.

I found out about Earth Hour on TV.

I discovered American Idol, and yes, I have been following it weekly.

I am now glued to the set as the first race of the F1 season is about to begin...there they go.

I am curious - what makes you glued to your TV set?

One last thing - it's not at all related to TV - I got tagged by a blogger buddy, Delaney. She really knows how to lift my spirits, even more than TV!This Friendship Tag, I am supposed to pass on. So I am tagging Vicki (we really should get together soon!), Avril (Koryu night this Friday?), and Livi (thanks for the pizza and spaghetti - keep it coming!).

Obsessing

I just read a post on Avril's blog about obsessing. Not that I am anywhere near her level of OC-ness, but I do know how to obssess, and when that happens, I normally do not stop until the obsession is satisfied.

I am afraid that I am obsessing about these details in my life. Perhaps I am being too inflexible? Perhaps I am expecting too much out of life and people?

I know I have it good, in a sense, but I can't help but wonder what it would be like if I had it better. Classic grass is greener way of thinking, huh?

I think I'll be better off reading Clapton's autobiography. Maybe I'll start obsessing about something more realistic, like learning to play the guitar well or something.

Heaviness

These past few weeks have been harrowing, to say the least. Today, it seemed as if I wouldn't be able to get past the day without breaking down. I had too much on my mind. I felt as if I just couldn't function normally anymore. In fact, I have been sleeping in every single day of the week.

I would think of all the stuff I have to accomplish at work: forms, grading, changes, meetings, dealing with people, etc. I would think of my responsibilities: family, my marriage, my bills, the truck, auto insurance, my debt....

I have been told that I think too much. I know that I have the tendency to take on more than I can actually handle, and that I usually end up living up to my responsibilities at my own expense.

All these having been weighing me down so much. Do I need to let go of some of these things to feel lighter?

Monday Pick Me Upper: So Small

I don't feel like posting a joke today, and since I am in a "Carrie Underwood mood," I thought I'd post something inspirational. I really like this song of hers. It helps me put things in perspective.

So Small
Carrie Underwood

What you got if you ain't got love
the kind that you just want to give away
It's okay to open up
go ahead and let the light shine through
I know it's hard on a rainy day
you want to shut the world out
and just be left alone
But don't run out on your faith

[Chorus]
'Cause sometimes that mountain
you've been climbing is just a
grain of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all
that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
seem so small

It's so easy to get lost inside
a problem that seems so big at the time
it's like a river thats so wide
it swallows you whole
While you sit around thinking
about what you can't change
and worrying about all the wrong things
time's flying by
moving so fast
you better make it count 'cause
you can't get it back

Sometimes that mountain you've
been climbing is just a grain
of sand
What you've been up there searching for
forever is in your hands
When you figure out love is all
that matters after all
It sure makes everything else
Seem so small

Destination Cebu: Day Tour

This post is long overdue. We've been back in Manila for two weeks, and the effects of our vacation have long dissipated into thin air. Anyhow, for those who might be interested in visiting Cebu City, the designated "Queen City of the South," here is some info.

How to get there
Cebu is perhaps the easiest and cheapest destination if you want to take Cebu Pacific. They always have promos and they have so many daily flights to and from Cebu. In fact, I already checked tickets prices for September (for our Moalboal trip) and it would only cost us a little over PHP1000 (roughly USD20) roundtrip.

Once you get to the Cebu Airport (this is in Mactan Island), you can rent a car to take you to your hotel, unless you have arranged transportation with your hotel. We were going straight to the pier to go to Bohol so we had no choice but to take the rental car. It wasn't that bad, PHP280. We were also lucky with our driver, Mang Jun. He was very pleasant and even agreed to drop by KFC since we hadn't had breakfast or lunch yet.

Getting around
We ended up hiring Mang Jun for the day when we came back to Cebu. His charged PHP2500 for 8 hours, including pick up from the pier.

You can opt to take cabs around the city, or even the jeepneys. There is no lack of transportation all throughout the city. We just didn't feel like waiting around for cabs and haggling with drivers about the fare. Also, Mang Jun pretty much knew where to go and what to see.

What to see
As with many other tourist destinations, Cebu has a list of "must visits." First we went up the mountain to get a glimpse of the city from above. I learned something new that day - Cebu City is in between mountains and the sea! I didn't know that before.... The view from the top was awesome, and we got there just in time because a few minutes later, the rain started to fall.Next stop was the Taoist Temple. It is strange that the temple is found right smack in the middle of a posh subdivision (guess what it's called? Beverly Hills). The temple itself was BEAUTIFUL. Take a look at the pictures and you'll understand what I mean.
From there, we went to the oldest street in the Philippines, Colon Street. There really isn't much to see - just a street and a monument.
We passed by Magellan's Cross (Magellan is the Spanish explorer who discovered the Philippines in 1521). Since it was raining and there were countless supporters of the Mayor holding a support rally, we didn't get out of the car anymore.

Here is the oldest triangular fort, dating back to the Spanish times.
We missed out on the place where they make guitars. I was already tired by then and we wanted to freshen up for dinner, so we went back to the hotel and got ready. Manong Jun took us to Crossroads. It's like this little area in town where you can find good restaurants, bars, and other establishments. We were going to eat at Lai Garden, where they have life seafood, which they will cook for you. Unfortunately, they did not have a grill! But take a look at this weird creature. The waitress said it's called a mantis. I think it looks like an alien lobster.We ended up eating at this resto bar called Blue Bayou. The food was good, the drinks excellent. I found myself downing a mojito and Long Island ice tea...needless to say, I had to go back to the hotel and relax after that.
Where to stay
Hotels abound in Cebu. I really do not know much about the hotels there but I would definitely NOT suggest staying at Golden Peak, where we stayed. The bartender makes a mean pina colada, and the staff is very hospitable. However, everything else will just frustrate you. The rooms are a bit shabby, they charge 40 pesos for an extra pillow, the bathtub is small and the bathroom fixtures a bit icky, the hot water goes on and off, the remote control didn't work.... It was not the best experience. But since we only stayed there for a night, it was not that bad. If you have money to spare, just go for the Marco Polo. I haven't heard anyone complain about their stay there.

The Lowdown
I didn't particularly enjoy Cebu. I mean, I had fun visiting the sites but I do not have the desire to go back just for the city. Perhaps I did not get to see enough, but I would really rather go outside the city and discover the beaches. Moalboal!!!

Need to Get Fit

This is one desire that I never seem to turn into reality. Year in and year out, I would talk about exercising and getting fit. After a few weeks (even days!) of trying though, I would soon forget about it.

Last weekend, Jerry and I were watching Sports Unlimited, and we saw a feature about Moalboal, Cebu. Apparently, they also have good a good beach there - perfect for snorkeling. Even more beautiful was this mountain river tour, which we now want to do in September.

In order to do this, we have to both shed a considerable amount of weight AND actually get off our bums. We're starting - we bought "healthy" food at the grocery store yesterday. I am going to ride my bike today. I am also looking at other exercises - maybe the Kettlebell exercise?

We have roughly 5 months to do this. I am very excited about the trek, I hope we can condition ourselves so as not to die while engaging in "real" physical activity. :p

Monday Pick Me Upper: Feminist Jokes

March is Women's Month so here are some jokes for you wonderful women out there.

One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash his Sweat- Shirt.
Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted to me, 'What setting do I use on the washing machine?'

'It depends,' I replied. 'What does it say on your shirt?'

He yelled back, ' Liverpool .'

And they say blondes are dumb...

-----------------------------------------------------------

A couple are lying in bed.

The man says,'I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world.'

The woman replies, 'I'll miss you...'

-----------------------------------------------------------

'It's just too hot to wear clothes today,' Jack says as he stepped out of the shower, 'honey, what do you think the neighbours would think if I mowed the lawn like this?'

'Probably that I married you for your money,' she replied.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking, sensitive man?

A: A rumour

-----------------------------------------------------------

A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary.

On their special day a good fairy came to them and said that because they had been so good that each one of them could have one wish.

The wife wished for a trip around the world with her husband.

Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands.

The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger...

Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!!

Gotta love that fairy!

-----------------------------------------------------------

Dear Lord,

I pray for Wisdom to understand my man;

Love to forgive him;

And Patience for his moods.

Because, Lord, if I pray for Strength,

I'll beat him to death. (Yeah, with our Bamboo shades. I heard that bamboo is the best material for these things. Ask the Chinese! lol)

----------------------------------------------------- -

Q: Why do little boys whine?

A: They are practising to be men.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Q: What do you call a handcuffed man?

A: Trustworthy.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

Have a great week everyone!

Destination Bohol: Getting There, Things to Do

Bohol is best known for being home to those little critters called tarsiers and the Chocolate Hills. For me, though, it will always be the place of mind blowing beaches. So how can you enjoy this experience yourself?

Getting There
There best and easiest way to get there would be to take a plane straight to Tagbilaran City, the capital. Do not be surprised, though, as the city isn't much to look at. It looks like a run down town, but since you will not be going there for the city anyway, it does not matter.

Cebu Pacific flies to Tagbilaran from Manila twice a week, and their fares are usually the cheapest. I think Philippine Airlines is offering affordable fares nowadays, too.

An alternative way of going to Bohol is to fly into Cebu City, and take a fast craft (ferry) to Tagbilaran. This is actually what we did, since I bought our airplane tickets to Cebu in December. Our original plan was to go to Camotes Island off the coast of Cebu, but this fell through, so we decided to go to Bohol. I know that there are several ferries plying the Cebu-Bohol route but I got my tickets from SuperCat, a sister company of SuperFerry. You can buy your tickets in advance from two outlets here in Manila - 2Go at the People Support Building in Ayala and at the Pier. A one-way ticket costs PHP500 per person, but they have a promo right now that if you buy a round trip ticket, you only pay PHP600 (or something like that). You can also check out Weesam Express, if you cannot get SuperCat tickets.

Once you get to Tagbilaran City, you can go to the beach resort of your choice.

What to do
This one's a no brainer - HIT THE BEACH!

Seriously, though, aside from the beach, there are some tourist spots that you have to visit when in Bohol. What we did was rent a car and a driver to take us around for one day. Your hotel or resort can arrange this for you. I got a tip from a friend who goes to Bohol on a regular basis, though, and he gave me his contact there. The agency charged us PHP3000 for 8 hours, which was more than enough to visit the places I wanted to go to. If you need the number, leave a comment and I'll give you her number.

So where should you go and what should you see in Bohol?

TarsiersThese cute things are the main reason we went to Bohol. Every Filipino child learns about them in school, and I have been wanting to see a real one ever since I can remember. I heard that the "official" tarsier conservation area is not open to tourists anymore, as the animals have been getting sick due to tourism. No wonder! These are nocturnal creatures, and the countless tourists snapping pictures during the day are not helping.

I really felt bad about the tarsiers, after visiting one of the many roadside stands which house them. I asked the guide if they were legal - they were just makeshift establishments, with little trees as the tarsiers' home! He said that they have DENR permits.... Maybe the government should be stricter regarding this. Considering that the tarsiers are endangered, tourism must be curbed to keep the tarsiers in better condition. One idea would be to make it a rule to visit the tarsiers only at night, to adjust to their sleeping patterns. What do you think?

Chocolate HillsAnother thing that all Filipino children learn about in school - these little mounds of earth that look like chocolate. I found out that they are not so little after all! I barely made it to the top of one (and we even rode the car most of the way), but the view up there was amazing.

Manmade ForestI hadn't heard about the forest until the guide told us about it. I think it is a reforestation project of the government. It is a beautiful place with countless mahogany trees.

Blood Compact Site
This site really embarrassed me - not because of the monument, not because of history, but because of my ignorance. I know that we studied this in grade school but when Jerry asked me what it was for, I simply couldn't answer!

Thank God for Google...This is what the Blood Compact was all about, courtesy of Bohol.ph:

Also at Bohol, Legazpi was given a hostile welcome. From his Malay pilot, he learned that this hostility was due to marauding expeditions of the Portuguese. Coming from the Moluccas, the Portuguese raiders traversed the Visayan seas, and just a few years before, in 1563, had plundered Bohol and killed or enslaved about one thousand of its inhabitants. Of course, the Boholano's easily mistook the Spaniards for Portuguese.

Again with the help of his pilot, Legazpi explained two chiefs of Bohol, Datu Sikatuna of Bool and Datu Sigala of Loboc that they were not Portuguese, and had come in peace, and not to plunder or kill. This convinced the Kings to end their hostility and enter pact of friendship. On 16 March 1565 (or 25 March, records are confused due to the Gregorian calendar reform in 1584), Legazpi and Sikatuna performed the now famous blood compact, probably not far from the modern town of Loay. This event is still celebrated in Bohol every year in June with the Sandugo ("One Blood") festival.

I knew it was for peace!

Loboc River
The Loboc River has this emerald green color - I thought it looked dirty but the locals will swear by its cleanliness. It reminded me of the River Kwai in Thailand, only much smaller. We had lunch on one of the many river boats. A buffet lunch for one costs PHP300. Not bad. The food was okay (nothing spectacular but good anyway) and the experience of floating up and down the river and watching some kids perform was fun.

Prony the PythonThis python is supposed to be the longest and biggest snake kept in captivity. I abhor snakes. They freak me out, but Jerry likes them so we went to take a look. You have to pay PHP5 to enter the backyard - yeah it's kept in a cage behind the owner's house. There are other animals there - birds, monkeys, etc. And there is this stupid sign that says "The animals are stressed when you take they pictures, so to be fair, leave a donation."

I have never seen a stupider sign than that! And the she-male manning the gate of the python cage repeating "be fair" didn't help my mood at all. (No offense intended, but that person was just irritating.)

Those are the places that we visited. There are actually more - the Bohol Bee Farm, the Baclayon Church, some cave (I forget its name), Alona Beach, etc. I was dead tired by 4pm, though, and I couldn't force myself to go to the other places. We did pass by the Church and the Bee Farm but we didn't stop.

NEXT...CEBU

Dumaluan Beach Resort in Bohol

I was planning on writing something more comprehensive about the trip we recently went on but time seems nowhere to be found. So here, just take a look at the pics and enjoy!

The sign welcoming us to Tagbilaran City - about 20 minutes from the beach. I couldn't wait to get out of there!
My first glimpse of the ocean. The water was so beautiful and the sand so powdery soft!
Heaven...
"Our" table. See Koryu with Jerry?
I got me a starfish...don't worry, I returned it to the water.
Done for the day.
See the size of that piece of tiger prawn?
Very nice pool in front of our cottage.
After dinner drinks with Marc from Belgium.

Next up...how to get to Bohol and what to do there.

Apple Store in the Philippines!!!

Seems like today is the day of discovering online shops for me! Earlier this evening, I found out that Apple has a store in the Philippines. I mean, I know they have Apple Centers in some malls but I didn't know that we could actually buy the official stuff online. Pity I threw away my credit card this morning! Actually, that might have been a blessing. Otherwise, I might be in more debt by now. And since I seem to keep finding these stores, next thing you know, I might stumble upon a cheap lingerie store online. Or maybe another travel web site that will entice me to go back to the beach in the very near future? Online shopping...whew!

Power Books Online Store

I'm back!!! My blog has been inactive in the past week because, try as I might, I was not able to spend that much time online while at the beach. Oh, I did spend at least a couple of hours each day but I had to deal with other commitments and my personal blog had to "suffer." I did update my Twitter every single day - several times a day, in fact.

Anyhow, before I post my "mandatory" vacation posts, I thought I'd write something about my new discovery - the online store of Power Books. I discovered its existence through an ad which I saw on Facebook. I checked it out this morning and I liked what I saw.


I was only really looking for George R.R. Martin's 2nd book (Song of Ice and Fire Series) but I stumbled upon Eric Clapton's bio, and I couldn't pass that up. I was afraid that the charges would be astronomical but take a look at that screenshot - not bad at all! I think I have found an online store that I would be frequenting a lot. I am glad that we finally have something like this in the Philippines!

Putting My Records On

I discovered this a wonderful song while watching American Idol last weekend. This pretty girl sang a very happy tune that made feel lighter just listening to it. Naturally, I had to search the Web for the artist and the song. As it turns out, the song is Put Your Records On by Corinne Bailey Rae. This song has been playing in my mind ALL week. Maybe it's my subconscious trying to keep me sane.

Here's the video. I hope it makes you feel happy - it never fails to brush away the claws of depression trying to get a stranglehold on me.



Lyrics below.

Three little birds, sat on my window.
And they told me I don't need to worry.
Summer came like cinnamon
So sweet,
Little girls double-dutch on the concrete.

Maybe sometimes, we've got it wrong, but it's alright
The more things seem to change, the more they stay the same
Oh, don't you hesitate.

Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,
Just go ahead, let your hair down.

You're gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow.

Blue as the sky, sunburnt and lonely,
Sipping tea in the bar by the roadside,
(just relax, just relax)
Don't you let those other boys fool you,
Got to love that afro hair do.

Maybe sometimes, we feel afraid, but it's alright
The more you stay the same, the more they seem to change.
Don't you think it's strange?

'Twas more than I could take, pity for pity's sake
Some nights kept me awake, I thought that I was stronger
When you gonna realise, that you don't even have to try any longer?
Do what you want to.

Girl, put your records on, tell me your favourite song
You go ahead, let your hair down
Sapphire and faded jeans, I hope you get your dreams,
Just go ahead, let your hair down.

Oh, you're gonna find yourself somewhere, somehow

Yeah, I am gonna.

Ready for the Weekend

Got this in an e-mail...I don't really like cats but this picture sums up things pretty well. Two more days...

Countdown to Vacation

March is not really vacation time, is it? I had the chance to book dirt cheap tickets to the beach for this weekend, though, so I didn't think twice - just got them. Now I am counting the days till I can leave the city behind and bask in the warmth of the sun...on the beach...with a nice cold glass of [whatever drink].

Going on a vacation is not that simple though. I gotta go to the mall and get stuff that we need. Quick checklist...meds...sunblock...slippers...UGG boots (lol, how'd that get in there? They have nice slippers, though.)...travel toothbrushes...lotion...facial tissue...facial wash...more meds...

I wish I had taken Friday off so I could have more time to prepare!

MONDAY PICK ME UPPER: Why It's Better to Be a Woman

There's a long list at Cool Funny Jokes. Here are my top picks.

1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We get to flirt with systems support men who always return our calls, and are nice to us when we blow up our computers.
3. We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
4. We can cry and get off speeding fines.
5. Taxis stop for us.
6. Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
7. We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
8. We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
9. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
10. We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
11. If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
12. We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
13. If we marry someone 20 years younger, we're aware that we look like an idiot.
14. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
15. We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions.
    

Need I say more?

Mr. Kurosawa @ Eastwood Mall

The new Eastwood Mall has been opened since December but I had not really taken the time to check it out. I don't like "malling."

For some reason, I felt "adventurous" today so I asked Jerry if he wanted to go there for lunch and maybe go around a little bit. First stop was Mr. Kurosawa, which Ren said had really good food - plus, I hadn't had Japanese food in a while so the craving was starting to kick in. Now get ready for some of the most mouthwatering Japanese dishes I have ever had!

For the appetizer, we ordered bowls of miso soup with clams. Unfortunately, they only had one serving left so we had to share, which was a pity because the soup was so good! I have had miso with fish but never with clams. I like the latter better.
For PHP108, it was very much worth it!

I also ordered some sushi. They call it Spicy Tuna Ledger. It was your basic roll of sushi, fried, with raw chunks of tuna on top and a pretty slice of fried potato. I have to say, the tuna practically melted in my mouth! It was so velvety and was just spicy enough to give the dish a little kick. Four large pieces for PHP228 - a bit pricey but not bad, in my opinion. I was a bit disappointed with the soy sauce, though. It tasted a bit like the Silver Swan or Datu Puti that you buy for adobo. (Don't get my wrong, I like that kind of soy but not with sushi.)

Next up - Beef Teppan and Seafood Teppan Platter. We always order this dish (or whatever is the closest to it) when we eat Japanese. The cut of the beef was different - it came in chunks, as opposed to the strips that we are used to. But let me tell you, I had the most tender chunks of beef for lunch! As you can see, the serving was not very big BUT the flavor and texture of the meat made up for that. PHP358 might be a bit steep, though.
If the serving size for the beef seemed small, this seafood platter was more than enough! I think that there were 5 or 6 prawns in there, 3 oysters (which made my tongue get thick, by the way), lots of tiny scallops, and chunks of tuna, dory, and salmon. We didn't finish the whole thing! This one goes for PHP548.

Another dish that we always order is the Ebi Tempura. It was nothing special, but just as good as any other tempura that I've had. PHP368 for 5 pieces.
Needless to say, we were both stuffed to the brim after that meal. I even had to take home a doggie bag - I only managed to down 2 of the sushi rolls. Oh, and Jerry had some Japanese fried rice, which didn't really impress. He also had some blue tea (I thought it looked gross). If you want to take a look at the menu, just click on the pictures below.

They're not very clear - I forgot Garcia (again!) and had to make do with Kvothe's mediocre camera.